Barenaked Ladies began as the duo of Ed Robertson and Steven Page. The two went to school together since Robertson was in grade four (Page was a grade ahead) at Churchill Heights Public School, but were not friends until they ran into each other at a Harvey’s restaurant following a Peter Gabriel concert. Each interested to find that the other liked Gabriel, they began talking and found they had many of the same tastes. The two became friends, and bonded further when they were both counsellors at Scarborough Schools Music Camp. They would play songs together, and Steve was impressed by Ed’s ability to harmonize. When Page had an extra ticket to a Bob Dylan concert that no one wanted, he ran into Robertson at a party. The two attended the concert at Exhibition Stadium (most likely on August 29, 1988). Bored by the show, the two turned to amusing each other, pretending they were rock critics, inventing histories and comments about the Dylan band. They also made up various band names; one of which was “Barenaked Ladies”.
On another front, Robertson had agreed to perform with his cover band in a battle of the bands at Nathan Phillips Square for the Second Harvest food bank.The band broke up and he forgot about the gig. When he received a phone call a week before the show, asking him to confirm the gig, he improvised that the name of the band had changed to “Barenaked Ladies”, recalling the name from the Dylan concert. He then called Page and asked if he wanted to do the gig; Page reportedly could not believe Robertson had given that name. They arranged three rehearsals and missed them all. The two played the show on October 1, 1988, but instead of competing, they played while the other bands set up, playing every song they could think of that they both knew. The show went well and they were invited to open a show for another well-known local band, The Razorbacks, at the Horseshoe Tavern the coming weekend. They set up three more rehearsals, and again missed them all; they proceeded to improvise their set once again. This would set a precedent for an element of Barenaked Ladies concerts which still almost always contain some improvised raps or songs, as well as general improvised banter.
If I Had $1,000,000
“If I Had $1000000” is a song by the Canadian musical group Barenaked Ladies. It was written by Steven Page and Ed Robertson. It has become one of the band’s best-known songs, and is a live show staple, despite never having been a true single and having no music video.
http://djallyn.org/media/barenaked-ladies_if-i-had-a-million-dollars.flvIf I had a million dollars (If I had a million dollars)
Well I’d buy you a house (I’d buy you a house)
And if I had a million dollars (If I had a million dollars)
I’d buy you furniture for your house (maybe a nice chesterfield or an ottoman)
And if I had a million dollars (If I had a million dollars)
Well I’d buy you a K-Car (a nice reliant automobile)
And if I had a million dollars, I’d buy your loveIf I had a million dollars I’d build a tree-fort in our yard
If I had a million dollars you could help, it wouldn’t be that hard
If I had a million dollars maybe we could put a little tiny fridge in there somewhere.
“You know, we could just go up there and hang out.”
“Like open the fridge and stuff, and there’d all be foods laid out for us like little pre-wrapped sausages and things. They have pre-wrapped sausages but they don’t have pre-wrapped bacon.”
“Well can you blame them?”
“Yeah.”If I had a million dollars (If I had a million dollars)
Well I’d buy you a fur a coat (but not a real fur coat, that’s cruel)
And if I had a million dollars (If I had a million dollars)
Well I’d buy you an exotic pet (yep, like a llama or an emu)
And if I had a million dollars (If I had a million dollars)
Well I’d buy you John Merrick’s remains (all them crazy elephant bones)
And if I had a million dollars I’d buy your loveIf I had a million dollars we wouldn’t have to walk to the store
If I had a million dollars we’d take a limousine ’cause it costs more
If I had a million dollars we wouldn’t have to eat Kraft dinner
“But we would eat Kraft dinner.”
“Of course we would, we’d just eat more.”
“And buy really expensive ketchups with it.”
“That’s right, all the fanciest Dijon ketchups.”If I had a million dollars (If I had a million dollars)
Wel I’d buy you a green dress (but not a real green dress that’s cruel)
And if I had a million dollars (If I had a million dollars)
Well I’d buy you some art (A Picasso or a Garfunkel)
And if I had a million dollars (If I had a million dollars)
Well I’d buy you a monkey (haven’t you always wanted a monkey?!)
And if I had a million dollars I’d buy your loveIf I had a million dollars; if I had a million dollars
If I had a million dollars; if I had a million dollars
If I had a million dollars… I’d be rich!
- Audio from the 1992 album, Gordon:
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